Unwilling

Yesterday should have been my day off. But it wasn't. I was tired. Sleepless. Miserable. I forgot my purse at work. Ending up not having a cigarette until this morning as I could not buy any. Survived. Received a phone call from boss telling me what to buy and how to spend my own hard earnt money to decorate showroom for Easter as they haven't sent through some money for expenses. Then was told how to work with leaflets which I do not have. I ordered them last week and again this week. I got ignored

Realised it is Earth day and I have done absolutely nothing to mark it. So I feel guilty and am too tired to come up with a good idea.

Work starts 9 AM tomorrow and boss is coming down to check that I bought everything she told me. They still haven't made provisions for advertising.

I got 78 from literature. I am 7 points away from my target mark. Which feels really good. The best I ever had was 80 which was last academic year. The best I had this year was 70 from literature. I am still uncertain which degree to do. I can see that Literature is my thing but I desperately need English to get to the right Masters. Oh it is so hard, but I have almost another year to think about it.

I am going to London on Sunday, for a coffee with a friend. Actually I just realised I can no longer afford that coffee with a friend. Or that trip to London. I am pissed off.

I need a cigarette. I am unwilling to quit.